Pots & Pans and my wedding #2

Here it goes... I am going for round 2 at this blog entry. Earlier, I sat down and wrote a wonderful (I thought anyways, but I might be a little biased) loooonnngg piece and then when I pushed SAVE, it must have thought I said SEND...into cyberspace! I had to scream at the computer as if it was a person in shear frustration and rage and doing so maybe hoping it would bring it back? I would like to speak with that little man in cyberspace who posts blog posts and give him a piece of my mind and then I want to talk to his manager...the nerve of some people! Now I'm sad...For those of us creative writers...writings are our "babies"...like a painter who is attached to his/her paintings, singer who sings a song, ice sculptor... his/her sculpture, the list goes on. You (at least I) become very attached to my writings, no matter the topic or length. When something like this happens, its as if you have to forget it ever existed. You remember. You remember very well. It was a part of you. You exposed, You breathed into something beyond you. You will always remember it and you still look back. I hate that. Plus I cant remember alot of what I wrote, ouch. Now some might say " Arent you being a bit dramatic?" Well, how in the world do you think I got the nickname from a dear friend (Kari R) "Drama Queen" It takes a lot of work to get a name like that, and I have earned every letter believe me.
I am frustrated, and in some ways, funny as though it may seem dont want to sit and write it again, but I must. For a writer, to write is to live and in order for me to live I have to write. Writing for me is like breathing, it takes no effort, is God breathed and a steady rise and fall like ones chest as they inhale and exhale. So here goes. Hopefully it will be better, Lord help me, I really want to relay my story in the way it should be. May it glorify Your Name above all Names. Amen. Here goes:

Well ladies and Gentlemen, I did it. Yes, I did it. I was almost registered for my wedding at Target last week.
What??? you say---
Now you are probably wondering what the heck Im talking about, seeing that in reality I have been married for 16+ yrs, why would I need to register at Target? Seems a bit odd to do that now, dont ya think? Well, thats the funny thing. Well not funny at the time thing but haha funny later kind of thing. I didnt think I needed to register, unless any of you want to send gifts I'd be happy to oblige. However the other day a cashier at Target thought I should, and all but wheeled me over to the registery area.

Here goes the story:

I go to Bed, Bath and Beyond to return some pans which were not only unworthy of 10.00, they should have gone out in the beyond and lose themselves deep into the abyss of pots and pans gone bad. (Maybe I should have sent them to that little man in cyberspace to thank him for all his hard work)After doing so without incident, I head over to Target to purchase a better set found in their AD for that week. In addition to the pan set you get a FREE egg pan in addition to the one in the set. I just cant refuse FREE!! Cameron my youngest is with me, and we find the set ok and the FREE pan, and head to the checkout. We get to the register and I quickly inform the cashier very proudly (Like I did something special) that the pan that I was putting on the whatever you call that thing where you set your items??? on I get for FREE and comes with the purchase. I dont know why but I was concerned that I would be charged for the FREE pan...that would be such travestry and cause for a "panning" over her head or other cruel and unusual punishment ,hence the next days headlines in the VC Star (Women gets "panned" by another for charging a customer for a pan that was supposed to be FREE) You would think I was speaking french because she had this weird look on her face...either that or I had something on my face....maybe lunch or something. So I said it again. She immediately says "Oh, You need to go over and register...huh? now Im thinking that SHE is speaking french...again huh? I explain this time that it is a gift with the set, not a gift for someone and she tells me that the register won't ring it up unless its we go to the blue square thingie of which she makes a square gesture with her hand.

I guess my look must have informed her of my misunderstanding because she says it again and points us to the cust service desk and find some blue square thing and register. Hmmm I wonder in bewilderment. So Cameron and I look at each other and head over..."Sure, Im not getting married but surely I need to register in order to buy a set of pans with a FREE pan. That sounds right doesnt it friends?

We get there and see the blue square thingie and immediately I know this isnt right. So I wait for a sec or two absolutley bewildered as to why this is necessary, all I want to do is buy my pans and other goods and go. Thats it. Hubby is waiting out in the car with a migraine and is probably wondering how much its going to cost him to get out of that store, or if hes going to have to take over my chair and roll me out as Im screaming "No just one more thing I want to look at honey!" "PPPlllleeeeaaassssseeee!

Finally a cashier comes to the desk> I explain to her "The cashier over there told me in order to buy this pan set that comes with a FREE pan, that I need to come over here to the registry thing and register on the blue square thingy, and that it wont ring up at the register. She said I'll have to pay for the FREE (in case you havent noticed I like saying that) egg pan. By then a second cashier comes over and hears what Im saying. The first cashier looks at me with that you're speaking french look of which I have come to know and use myself, and will store it away the next time this happens (note to self...do not let this happen again!) She says "I dont know why she told you that, its not true." Gee theres a thought. The women talk it over for a sec. I think trying to figure out what in the world thids lady would say this. I am figuring by now that she is a new cashier and have pity on her, despite my frustration.

As we are talking, I notice the ad is sitting there and so I show them the ad, not realizing that there is a CLUB WEDD logo at the bottom directly under the ad giving details on how to register. Then the cust service cashier says some things that I will never forget the rest of my life "Oooohhh, now I know why she said that, you have to register in order to buy these items" Ok duh I have already been told that how many times now? What I want to kow is why. The words ringing in my head as though I had a deja vu moment there. I am bewildered and about to flip a lid or gasket or something, maybe a wheel off my chair...something like that...it wouldnt be pretty..."Woman in wheelchair "pans" two women in Target for speaking french to her." Great role model I would be for my son Cameron, huh? Over the course of our discussion of this not making sense to me and her trying to explain it to me over and over pointing to this CLUB WEDD logo, I finally come out and say, (trying so hard not to lose my cool) (SIDENOTE those of you who know me knows this is a rareity, at least I would like to think so, except for my family they would probably say Im like that all the time hahaha)
After about 10min, I say words I never thought would come out of my mouth in all of history "You mean to tell me that I cannot buy this pan set with the FREE pan unless I am getting married???? She then says words back to me I thought I would never hear "Yes that is correct, you see this logo under here says that, again pointing to the logo." "You have got to be kidding me" "Seriously???" "You are telling me I cannot buy this pan set with the FREE egg pan unless I register and am getting married??? I repeated it again to make her hopefully notice how obsurd that sounds. In my mind I picture me trying to pay for it with $$ in hand and the Target employees telling me "NO, we will not accept your $$ unless you are getting married...what a thought huh? No person I know would turn down $$ when you want to buy what they are selling...isnt that the way its supposed to go??? Finally, totally exhausted and ready to go home except I couldnt stand the thought of going to the car and explaining to my husband not only the unbelievable story, but that because I returned the awful set prior, we now have no cookware (is that really so bad though now that I think about it ladies??) So I ask her, "Can you please ring this up and see if it will work...again with the picturing in my mind of the register saying "is the person getting married?" If not Im not opening...what a thought. She agrees and rings it up...lo and behold what do you think happened my friends??? Any guesses???It didnt do that! We decide to ring the pan set up first then the FREE egg pan , it said pan set so and so is 49.99 ...so I waited in intrepidation and she rings up the egg pan and it says something like "gift" 0.00 ....gee imagine that!! What a thought...the computer was smarter than the employees! oooppss did I just say that?Just writing it is putting me back to that oh so scary place of stress and bewilderment and the thought of multiple pannings, but more than anything shaking my head at a story I surely will be telling my grandkids..."Now little Timmy and little Jessica" (I hope my kids dont name their kids that...hopefully they will have names like Kaeden, or Kylie Rae or something out of the ordinary (cant think of other names although in the prev log I had some good ones) oh sorry Im drifting off the subject must be from my delerium from the whole escapade. And with that I pay and am off to the car with my purchases and go home.

So the moral of the story ladies and gentlemen is if you buy a pan set...make sure you register first on the blue squeare thingie!

Tata for now--- I need a nap after this!


LG